As a young girl, I had the concept of ambition beaten into me by very materialistic and ego driven parents, who insisted that being successful meant having lots of fancy stuff and piles of money. What was interesting to realise as I grew up and began my own career, is that none of that stuff made me happy. For what is the point of being successful, if one is not happy. For years, I had been making myself miserable pursuing that which did not bring any long term relief from the greater unknown darkness that pierced the periphery of my mind in my younger years.
As I began to confront the darkness, and as I came to know the true ugly nature of the beast that hides in the darkness, I realised that the only way to truly be free of that darkness, was to escape the trappings of the materialistic ego driven mind set. This was an extremely painful process of personal deconstruction and reconstruction, a deconstruction of the empty vacuous shell, and a reconstruction into the purpose driven person I have become. What was interesting to note was that the reconstruction was more of a recognising of the real me which had been tortured and suppressed for so long behind the artificial construct which is projected upon us by society, in order to keep us totally ignorant of the truth, and enslaved to the power structure.
Daring to break free of that artificial construct often comes with much sacrifices on many levels. The toughest loss is that of friends and family who still live in that old paradigm mental prison, and are not satisfied unless you are sharing that prison with them. Choosing to be free often means the loss things and loved ones, but the pursuit of freedom is for me, the reasons I chose to be here at this time. I can not deny my life’s purpose, and when one finally awakens to their true purpose, often nothing else will satisfy that need to fulfil that which you came here to do, no matter what the sacrifice.
I was born with a tremendous amount of creative capacity, having painted for art galleries since the age of eleven. It was only natural that it was in my creative abilities that my purpose would lie. There is truly nothing more rewarding in life than to be a Creative Visionary, and to have that vision realised. This has been the greatest and most rewarding achievement of my life, and this is for me, the true measure of success. It is a fulfilment on a level that is unprecedented, and far beyond the satisfaction of a fat wallet, a jacuzzi or pretty shoes. It is truly a blessing to be able to get up each day and do something that really means something, as I know not everybody has this privilege. That does not mean that it is an easy ride. I can not even begin to relay the gauntlet of challenges that such a cutting edge project presents. The greatest challenge is the lack of resources to a do a very full time job of running a LIVE visual broadcast network dedicated especially to FREE & INDEPENDENT MEDIA.
Daring to do that which truly makes a difference on a larger scale comes with a great deal of spiritual insight and inner work. We are all dealing with the residual negative programming we have been subjected to since we were born, and thus it is important to be honest with one’s self about what is necessary and what is relevant to any project or endeavour that claims to focus on the creation of a better world. One must never fall into the trap of projecting their own ideas and agendas into situations. Being truly in touch with our Earth, and feeling what is needed, rather than projecting one’s own desires, is a key element in positive co creation and manifestation.
Having worked on many different projects and global initiatives, I have seen all to often how easy it is to slip into those old destructive patterns of putting one’s self at the centre of a project. It has been a valuable experience to witness the chaos and destruction that this kind of attitude and behaviour brings, especially to those who participate in the project under the illusion that are operating with an equal footing to the supposed figure heads, which is usually not the case. Indeed, there are still those who feel a sense of superiority or entitlement over their fellow human beings, and this is absolutely no different to the psychological soil upon which the seeds of our current enslavement system is sown. The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again, whilst expecting different results. We simply can not hope to create a better world by perpetuating the old and destructive patterns of the past.
Anybody can make money, indeed, it is much tougher to make a difference, not least because of the fact, that the first and most important change has to come from within. I do not claim to be Zen or spiritually perfected or more aware than anybody else, but I do genuinely want to see humanity fulfil it’s true potential and for the suffering and destruction to dissipate. I for one am utterly sick and tired of the limitations put upon us because of other people’s desire to profit off a suffering and enslaved population. The world is frustrated and aggravated, and things are beginning to reach a fever pitch, even from within our Earth. We are feeling the vibrations heightening the tension, and feeding into our own inner burning desires to do more, be more, to create and bring peace, and to end suffering for the purposes of profit.
This is indeed a spiritual war, but at the very heart of those engaged in this spiritual war, in nothing but peace. And thus, we may all have to roll up our sleeves, work our arses off, and perhaps do things we may not enjoy doing, after all we are at war, and war is never pleasant. What is important to always remember, is that key fundamental orientation of knowing that what ever conflicts or battles we may be engaged in, that we always remain in our hearts, in complete peace. We must not project an inner war onto others, for that is how we got into this dire situation in the first place. Learning to be disciplined about how we manifest our energies is key to gaining the emotional maturity necessary to heal our suffering and broken world. This maturity is a hard won treasure, but be sure, if you seek it, life will throw at you the necessary challenges. For what does not kill you, makes you stronger.
And as we wonder ever closer to actually creating a world that is fit for our children to inherit, we pause a moment to recognize that those who are pioneering this path, are often the most vulnerable, and need our utmost support and compassion. We need to be patient with the evolution of others, for we all evolve at our own pace, and in so doing we facilitate our own growth and evolution.
Peace Love Unity Respect